Here is how it played out with a Verizon representative online when I noticed my service installation date was 10/01/10 instead of 10/01/2009:
Verizon: I am happy to assist you with your order today. How may I be of service?
Steven Slater: Hi, I noticed my due date is 10/01/2010. I was hoping for service this year.
Verizon: Yes, that is correct. Please make sure someone is home for the technician to complete the order.
Steven Slater: The due date is next year. Get me? 2010 is next year. This is 2009. Understand?
Verizon: Yes, that is correct. Are you interested in upgrading your service?
Steven Slater: I haven't been connected yet! I don't have service!
Verizon: Please make sure someone is home to allow the technician access to your inside wiring.
Steven Slater: that's fine, but I want service THIS YEAR in 2009. Please look again at the due date. The due date is NEXT YEAR 10/01/2010
Verizon: I see the Verizon technician wasn't able to complete the order on the due date given to you. You will be charged a service fee for connection because it must be rescheduled.
Steven Slater: What? The due date is not until NEXT-EFFING-YEAR. Even if the due date was today, as it should be, I have been home and conscious all morning. No one rang my bell!
Verizon: Would you like to upgrade your service today?
Steven Slater: Am I chatting with a human being or is this HAL?
Verizon: I don't understand your question. Your business is important to us. Would you like to hear about our package deals?
Steven Slater: That's it! Cancel my order! Leave me alone! Forget I exist!
Verizon: I'm sorry, I can't do that. Would you like to hear about or convenient billing options for your past due account?
Steven Slater: WTF #@%* are you talking about PAST DUE ACCOUNT?!? You haven't installed anything! I don't have any Verizon services! Get me a supervisor or at least a human being!
Verizon: I'm sorry, I can't do that. Would you like to hear about Verizon FiOS?
